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"The seeds of the whispers of your heart you saw yield a harvest of an unparalleled blend of grasses and flowers.

You won't find as many blades of grass turned towards the sun, growing at the same pace and distance from each other, on any other meadow in the world, or worlds, that were, that haven't yet begun, although they all live here and now in the mind of creation.

Nowhere beyond your meadow will you find the same flowers, so many species, colors, shapes, and sizes, as those you are privileged to experience within you.

Nowhere beyond your meadow the cicadas will turn their percussive lullaby up to the same volume.

And even if that is possible, your eyes aren't mine...
And even if that can be done, your ears aren't mine.

Look around the kingdom of your gifts.
Pause at the flower that calls to your heart now. 
Stop and feel, watch, and smell.
And marvel over it.
Each of the flowers is the fruit of your heart's seeds. 
You are the gardener of the meadow of your life.

Your flower could be a painted picture, a brush in your hand, and the colors of paint are the freedom to immerse yourself in the sweet darkness of chaos of imagination.

Your flower could be the sorrow of a child, over which you will bend, kiss on the forehead, remind them that they are part of the universe, that they too are a meadow through which the universe smiles at itself.

Your flower is being so open to the energies of others that the universe flows through your body like a song.

Pause at the flower that calls to your heart."

Text Copyright ©️ Krzysiek Mlodzik
‐‐---
How is your body feeling today? 
Let's connect with our bodies and experience their innate beauty and wisdom. I have a few questions for you:

- Where do you think you should be different in a physical sense?
- Where do you not like your body?

It's not easy to go there, I know. But these few minutes you take each day to acknowledge where you think you're not good enough will change your life. 
It has changed mine. 
With lessened self-judgment, I've created more space within my mind to explore new possibilities and foster more self-belief in all areas of my life. 

More self acceptance equals more self love, and more self love equals more love in your life, more loving and accepting people, more abundant experiences...

It's an ongoing process, and it keeps on giving and giving...

More self acceptance equals more self love, and more self love equals more love in your life, more loving and accepting people, more abundant experiences...

So, if you will, take a minute now and focus on your body. 
You can close your eyes and, in your mind, scan your unique body from the top of your head to your toes. 
Breathe slowly as your attention moves down through the parts of your body. 
Slow down and give the miracle of your body time and attention.

What in your mind would you like to be different? 
Got it? 
Good. 
Now, for the rest of today, contemplate the following:

- Why do I want this part of my body to be different?
- Am I comparing it to someone else whom I think is better than me?
- How is this part of my body connected to me feeling emotionally and mentally safe?
- What have I done to make this part of my body out of my mind?
- How would I feel if I accepted this part of my body as it naturally is?

Anything that comes up, make a note of it on your phone or on paper. 
It can be a memory or realisation.
Sometimes all that it takes to create a shift in life is merely acknowledging where we don't yet love ourselves.

Over time, you'll get more clarity on how accepting this part of your body that you've been judging is connected to your overall sense of well-being and audacity to be your beautiful, authentic self—a unique human being that you are.

And please remember, the reason why you are who you are and you look the way you look is that if you were any different, you wouldn't have the potential to change a piece of your world by being yourself. Simple as that. The jigsaw puzzle is made up of many unique pieces.

I hope this helps. Let me know how you find this exercise.
-----
What's that you can run from but you can never truly ditch?
What makes you not fit for the category and makes your story unique?
What is about things you love that makes your heart lit?
What makes your entire soul tik?
-----
Our human world, the way it works, is a compiled - into one collective story - reflected self belief of each human being.
This world wouldn't offer any kindness or compassion if it couldn't offer pain, nor violence, horror.
We learn, we remember here the values held deep in our hearts through the path of discernment.
That's why there's black and white, good and bad, and all others manifested polarities of the world, so each of us can make choices and remember what divides and what unites...
----
The path of integrity is a meandering one. It takes you through the road of unconscious reactions.
What you judge about yourself? Where you don't feel safe to accept yourself, express yourself authentically.
Notice and write down the heavy emotions you experience in your interactions with people. 
Connect them with similar experiences from your childhood.
Awareness is the first step to alchemy, the fruit of alchemy is remembering your unique sweet magic. 
---‐-
Journeying through the darkest crevices of pain in the human psyche, your spirit of love brings a torch of illumination to us all. The inevitable light animating your body still shines, ever so bright as a proof of your eternal power and courage. You are a divine example of how much a person in this world can endure and transform pain into revelations, then thrive, dancing with a smile of joy and a twinkle of innocence in their eyes. Against all logic, against that which has caused many to fall into the abyss of nothingness with no return, you stand strong. You are not only back; you stand in your magnificence, unpacking the gifts wrapped up in the challenges of your lifetime(s).

Open heart you are, so wide open to the winds of life's wisdom. The best friend. The best lover. The quality of your aura is like the most delicious dessert. Your mind is open to all that stirs us human beings. Your mind is open even to acknowledge its own need for introspection, piercing through itself to catch all unhealed agendas. Your mind is sharper than the finest knife, cutting through one's bullshit with precision and grace most of the time. Your mind quickly recognizes when it operates via projected self-judgment, dealing with it as if there is no tomorrow.

Consciously unraveling the false stories of the mind is like watering the rose of your expanding heart that compassionately encapsulates the whole earth, the whole cosmos, and all beings. One step, one cry at a time, you realize your super-abundant nature and birthright. Being authentically you and co-creating the life of your dreams is the biggest gift you can give to humanity and this world. Because when you are authentically you, swimming with the currents of the Spirit, the world becomes whole too.

Authenticity is wearing your heart on your sleeve. If you can willingly do that, still recognizing where you feel ashamed or scared to tell the truth, knowing that all these shadows of your psyche are in the queue to be embalmed with the self-love of the bounteous universe you are a unique agent of, you are doing your best and it's a true honor to witness you and your devotion to the unity of all things.

Sensational beauty in your eyes I marvel over. It catches my mind off guard; it draws me in like a bottomless sky-blue, turquoise sea that is a fractal of peace and silence. And the innocence in your eyes. Oh my Goddess!!! Smile! Smile at me again! Smile at me forever! My heart giggles every time the warmth of your parting lips flows through me like a hot spring. Despite my best attempts, there are no ways of conveying the joy I feel. I hope you can see it in the shining tears dancing in my eyes.

Transmutation could be your name if only the sound of the word stood any close to the beautiful symphony of yours. You are a queen of alchemy. Pain, sorrow, despair, and shame are lead you've turned into golden stars of awareness, which now lead you to your true North Star. Your unquenchable appetite for the refinement of your mind is a beacon of light for lost boys and girls scattered across galaxies of space and time, in the now, in the future, and in the past. Your heart, which you bravely wear on your sleeve often without even realizing it because you’ve so integrated your naturalness, is a lighthouse to those blessed to be graced with your presence and beauty, including myself.

Am I the luckiest man alive? I must be if you are my wife! It amazes me each day that you exist, that you’ve existed all this time, with your radiance, your big heart, your smile, and the most beautiful flower of love that reveals itself to me when I'm looking into and marveling over the treasure of your eyes. I love you!
-----
When a Soul incarnates on earth, when this formless purity of unconditional universal love descends into physical density She comes into the physical body with omniscient awareness of what She's signed up for; all the contrasts to Love which we have abundance of on this beautiful green and blue planet, all the patterns of thinking, believing and behaving that divide human beings that She steps down from the Heaven of Unity to transform back to Love, all conflicting energies of human race and the particular family, their history, all that runs deep into their dna, their karma. She is fully aware of what it all entiles. And this includes putting Herself in the shoes of a human being - forgetful of their Divinity, fearful of their physical body, fearful of their worth in the eyes of other humans, fearful of physical death. She knows the identity she inhabits. She knows precisely all unique physical and spiritual limitations to the body She ignites life of. She knows that She will experience pain, suffering, separation - things so different to Her vast true divine nature. She knows that She is Love. She knows that embodying Love in physical incarnation is the highest devotion She can bring Herself into. She knows what She is signing up fof. She does that because She is God who is here on earth to experience Love despite experiencing all that Love isn't at the same time. Time. She agrees to lose Herself and squeeze Her infinite essence in the mental reality bounded by time and space. 
Despite all paradoxes, limitations and perceived via human mind lack and unworthiness... She is ready to take on all of that and more. In the name of Unconditional Love from which this Universe derives.
-----
Every birth is traumatic. Creation always emerges from the realm of potential, and potential includes all possibilities, potentiality is chaotic and unpredictable for our human minds. Often times confusing and turbulent. That's merely the nature of creation. 
The human body needs oxygen to live. Imagine being born breathless. That was the very beginning of this current incarnations mine. Breath is Light, breath is Love and connective tissue of all living creatures, of the whole pulsating in one breath of Unity the Universe.
So imagine the scar being forced in the mind of a newborn. Cut off from Love, separated from Aspiration of representing a unique perspective of Consciousness. And still remembering its Divine essence, still only just crossing rhethreshold between eternal realms and dense form of humanity. Imagine then how that newborn child would feel being taken away from his mother, put into a tight container of an incubator. And imagine the fear. His fear and the fear of his mum. 
What story would this very first experience in this body create in the child's mind? How would it imprint his way of seeing g the world, interacting with people, his way of perceiving himself as a human being? 
The wound of rejection!!! On soul level this is what this soul has cone to transmute into Unity. This is the pattern running deep into dna and veins for this boy's ancestors, stirring their peace of mind, churning anxiously their guts, creating conflicts, division of selfishness, greed and blame, lack of accountability for their feelings and emotions, the mindset of unease and scarcity and many more such shadow frequencies. 
On the human level it must have been totally horrifying, not being able to breath right at the get go. What fears would this create in this tiny creature, what relationship to life itself, to feeling safe in his body?
What story would that create in her mind?! Not knowing if her child would survive. Her first born. Imagine all the emotions she would be feeling in her body, imagine those scars that situation would leave in her mind. Would that also create an emotional detachment in her mind towards her son? Oftentimes for us human beings the most horrifying things to experience are feelings of helplessness, not having control of what's going to happen. We fear the unknown. We fear it so much that we often create separation in our mind between ourselves and the source of pain.
These two, the Mother and the Son have signed a sacred Soul Contract together. As all souls sign such contracts between one another. In the name if Universal Love, in the name of Consciousness realising g itself in physical form, in the realm of mental and physical separation, where human minds pull the strings of fate. And this is the thing that makes all soul contracts so challenging. A human mind does not remember that it is merely a tool for navigating earthy adventures of the soul. A human mind creates its own identity and becomes impossible it onto human heart - the true connection with the essence of this world, Love. A human mind is not the enemy of the state of unity though, it is avital component and player enabling a soul to experience contrasts to Love, compassion, acceptance and unity on earth, in soul's journey to embody Herself in a human form.
-----
Choice

I have a choice to respond with kindness to chaos, with inquiry to clues encoded in the ever stretching, infinitely faceted game of life, with gracious understanding beyond the narrow scope of subjective judgment, with an insight from my heart, my direct connection with primordial sound of eternal now.
I have a choice to drown my heart in exhaustion of fear; to react driven by parts of me that still hurt, that need to be called back and embraced in order to heal and give my mind full picture of who I am truly.
I have a choice to listen with compassion or burn bridges behind me in anger.
I have a choice to regret my choices or learn. 
To recognise myself in your eyes.
I have a choice to indulge in sugar coated bitterness of ignorance and oblivion.

Sitting on the bank of the river of my life, I have a choice to watch it flow. 
I have a choice to dip my toes in or immerse myself fully in ever changing stream of feelings. 

I have a choice to sieve through occurrences and focus only on the obvious gold of happy moments and gold of fulfilment and peak experiences. 
And dismiss the rest, all the wisdom flowing through me all the time, all the information guiding me back to heart, all the questions entering my mind's eye. 

I have a choice of feeling the frustration and impatience when things don't go according to brain's plan. I have a choice of listening to the pain as though it is good old wise friend of mine. I have a choice of resisting it as though I didn't trust in omniscience of life. 

I have a choice of presence and attention. I have a choice to listen to the components of me that still need more care and reassurance of safety and acceptance.

I have a choice to inquiry a pose questions like this one: what is the most loving solution I am capable of creating in the given moment?

I have a choice in every second.
I have a choice to being unaware of this.
I always have a choice.
------
### Translation to British English

When you touch the sky in the eyes of your other half, when your heart dances in the silence that pushes everything else into the sea of things to do later, when your body desires only hers, when you remember your magic because she is the only one who truly sees you, who truly feels you... it's hard to come down to earth. It's hard to come down to earth. It's hard to concentrate on personal matters. It's hard to think about the dinner you're cooking by yourself, where she is not present. It's hard to be alone, without her. But it's even harder to think that it's wrong, that it shouldn't be this way, that when we are not together, life is cruel.

In the heart, everything is clear. The connection of souls and the separation of bodies. In the heart, everything is clear because it is eternal. Love lasts forever. The true kind. The one that has no beginning and no end.

-----

I think about how much I dislike in myself
That I feel so deeply
That no one will ever fully understand me
You know, no one will ever touch my soul
No one will ever stroke the spine of sensitivity

I look in the mirror
And adjust my lips into a smile
It's horrible to be a grumbler
Like those I've learned to mimic
To feel safe, unloved
But my eyes remain
Like a late autumn afternoon
Oh, how much I like my life

Looking into the passer-by's mirror
He talks down to his wife
Who has wide eyes of hope, that it's him
It transports me
Oh, it transports me
I don't want to feel that part of myself
I'm still angry at myself
I don't like that part of me
So I won't look at it

I hide from the truth
Because it hurts me
It embarrasses me
I hide from the truth about myself
I'm afraid to face myself
If I admit to my wrongdoings
I'll surely have to tell the world someday, right?
What will they think of me?
Already, I feel so deep in my own mess
Worthlessness hidden behind a facade
All-knowing convictions

I hide from the truth about myself
I escape to rooms of pleasure
That are currently available

I hide my truth
Like the boy I remember
Who hid under the table
From the noise of unchecked anger
Of Saturn
Who drank himself to a mumble
And stumbled and fell asleep
After a day’s work

I hide the verses of my story
Whole paragraphs
Whole chapters
Hiding the truth from others through self-judgment

But once a day comes when I meet her
We know each other like two halves of the same coin
Looking into the cosmos in opposite directions
We haven't seen each other in this life yet
But meeting is as natural as breathing
When that day comes and I look
Into your eyes
The list of unspoken lies
The pile of clothes needing washing
Forms endlessly
Each new revelation
Takes the lead dust off my wings
Intimacy breaks taboos, releases the beast from that hidden cage in the mind, created to prevent exposure to the vulnerability of what others might say
Already, I see myself so low, I don't want to be pushed and fall to another floor

But my heart now tells me, the time has come
When I see love in your eyes
You listen and nod
You listen, you were there, you understand
The weight on my shoulders falls away
From ancient boulders of self-harm

When you feel embarrassed
Trying not to blunder with your words
Please, look into the eyes of someone who understands you
And both of you embark on adventures for truth and see each other once again with the innocence of a child,
how it will be
Where it will take you...

If you think you don't have someone like that, look in the mirror
And say out loud what scares you the most to say out loud
If you're not ready, write all those words on paper
Paint your own judge
What does it prevent you from feeling?
It's hard to admit the wrongdoings, but without admitting
There is no authenticity
And without authenticity, there are no dreams
Realised
Because your true dreams come straight from the heart
Which you are afraid to show others
What will they say about you
Is that of greater importance than being yourself
Happy and fulfilled
And light-hearted?
The truth will set you free
The truth will set you free
-------
"Doubt is like a leaflet person in the street whom we tend to avoid eye contact with because we think we don't need what is in their hand.
Doubt is like an invitation from yourself to yourself to self inquire and deepening of trust in the voice of your heart.
The heart knows the way, the heart is filled with love only and everything that comes from love.
If it's not love you're feeling, then you are not in your heart, you are bogged down in the labiryths of your mind, filled with debris of previous experiences.
Come back to your heart, I tell myself when I finally clock what's going on in my energy and thinking, come back to your heart. Come back to Love."
------
GRANDPA KAZIU
Do you remember the day you decided that life wasn’t worth trusting? The decision had been forming in your mind for some time. But on that January evening, heavy with sleet, a milky-amethyst sky that, as sometimes happens in winter, didn’t intend to fully darken, the misty light of the living room lamp, the smell of beans and overcooked beef on your and your brother’s plates, the die was cast. From that moment, you began to believe what your mind dictated, evaluating sadness and anger as emotions that a person should never experience.

Since everyone who walks on this planet is a child of God, where does suffering come from, where does death, bloodshed, greed, and theft come from, right? And anger, too—you’re not supposed to be pissed at God, are you? You half-heartedly chew on the stale bread, even after dipping it in baked beans. The soup is hot; Mum always serves everything almost boiling. You prefer cold dishes; you instinctively know that your digestion needs food no warmer than room temperature.

Mum doesn’t like this, so you force yourself to avoid trouble. Criticism, shouting, disapproving looks—they all feel bad in your body, so you prefer to avoid them. For a few days, you’ve felt growing anxiety in your body.

For a few days, you’ve been praying without heart and faith in the evenings, for him to get better, for the lung cancer to leave his body, for that gaunt shadow with yellow fluid dripping from the corner of his mouth to be replaced by that big, kind-hearted bear with whom you feel so strongly connected. For him to get up from the hospital bed, growl over you once more, and smile with the corners of his mouth. In church, they always told you that God is almighty, that God answers prayers.

At almost twelve years old, you no longer believe in these fairy tales; you already know what’s happening in the world because you know firsthand what happens at home when Dad drinks, when Mum comes home from work in a bad mood. For a few days, you’ve been waiting, waiting for this bubble to finally burst. That grey, wet evening, the feeling in your body becomes unbearable.

It’s Tuesday, it’s tough. The day of the planet Mars, symbolising masculinity, reactivity, striving for action, war, anger. Everything that happens in life has multidimensional and symbolic significance.

Between one spoonful and the next of the cooling soup, the intercom rings in the hall. Mum is closest. “Yes?” she says, raising the receiver to her ear.

There’s silence for a few seconds, then a few indistinct words, a whimper, a quiet, breaking voice. Mum puts down the receiver and opens the door. “Who is it?” you ask, although part of you already knows.

“It’s happened.” And it has. “Grandma,” Mum says through tears.

Your brother throws his spoon onto the glass coffee table next to the plate of beans. The clink of metal on glass doesn’t match his furrowed brow and loud sigh. “You didn’t love him like I did,” the thought crosses your mind.

How dare you pretend to be angry? You feel as if your body has just dried up from all emotions. As if all the sadness, all the anger suddenly froze. As if they caused paralysis.

As if you couldn’t touch either. You think—what’s happening to me? You try to force yourself to cry, but the tears won’t come. You’ve cried them out in the evenings, escaping into prayers you didn’t believe in.

This is the moment when, as a maturing son, forming beliefs about the world and life, you now create an image of reality where miracles have no place, where faith in magic, the fulfilment of prayers, the possession of dreams loses its meaning. This is the time when you decide that what is imagined remains only there, in the realm of speculation and possibilities, and only what is heavy and painful can materialise. Life has no meaning.

Life never gives me what I want, what I need. Now look. Go back to that time and view the sequence of events with an objective eye.

Now I am aware. Now you are aware that everything that happens is the creation of the universe to experience the inseparability of each of its units, every fragment of consciousness and love. The body and mind, powered by the light of energy, your body and your mind are merely cells of the whole organism.

Each cell of life knows its place, its time of action, its role. Energy and spirit know this, not the mind. The mind must mature to integrate with the love that I am, that you are from birth to death, before birth and after death.

From my perspective, the painful human experience of losing Grandpa looks as follows. The figure of Grandpa represents in your life the archetype of masculinity, security, physical protection. It was Grandpa who came to your rescue when, as a ten-month-old baby, you fell between the bed and the wall unit.

It was Grandpa who took you on exciting trips to the market, to the colourful world of fruits, vegetables, clothes, and toys. It was Grandpa who introduced you to the world of figurines, superheroes, He-Man, and others, a world that opened your imagination and joy. It was Grandpa, not Dad, who was the one who hugged you, spent time and attention, with whom you didn’t feel like a burden, like a ball and chain.

It was Grandpa who gave you everything you couldn’t yet give yourself, and now he’s gone. Your personal god, your protector, is gone. The soul animating the mind and body you called Grandpa Kaziu has finished its journey on Earth.

His departure in the form you felt so strongly connected to brings a sense of pain, loneliness, separation from life, and injustice. However, all that he gave you in life and what he took with him when leaving this life is written in the contract of your souls. Between me, you, and him.

The illusion preached by the Catholic Church, the illusion of meaning that you adopted in your mind, that what is hard to accept for your mind, which only cares that you don’t feel emotional and physical discomfort, is unjust from a subjective point of view, is actually a gift that sheds the light of consciousness on an eternal truth. Every soul with a human body and mind is here to assimilate with them, to form unity in this physical world, in space and time, a sphere that the human mind divides into good and bad, to transcend judgment and see the whole picture through the eyes of God, God whom you are, whom every blade of grass, every ant, hole in the fence, dog poop, and person is, and this picture says one thing. Each of us has chosen to be a unique part of the world to experience the love we are in conditions that provide the illusion of its lack.

And what better way to achieve this than through contrast, through experiencing both poles and feeling intuitively, with the heart, connected to the whole universe, what true love is, and what is just fear of its lack, fleeing from feeling pain. The heart fears nothing, the heart fears not the unknown, the heart fears not feeling pain, only the mind does, because it knows only it is mortal. Knowing all this now, do you still need faith that miracles do not exist? Knowing that your faith creates a mirror reflection in reality...

---- old version:

I'm going to struggle again to finish this soup. Stale bread on side. Mum's going to moan again if I don't eat up. My brother is sitting next to me. He too, lips pursed, the spoon in his hand like an oar moves through water brown liquid full with butter beans and overcooked strips of beef. Neither of us knows what gratitude is. For having food on the table. Both of us knows that we'd eat anything but this. Both of feels full. Of fear of expressing a choice that is different to our mum's, our parent's. 

I knew it was coming. I knew it was a matter of days, hours even. It was inevitable. I knew that. But I didn't want to part with the naive, all is possible innocent part of myself. I didn't want to know about death. In hindsight I still believed in miracles. I still chose to believe in the old man sitting on a cloud orchestrating the matters of life and death on earth. I didn't believe in it, not really. The doctrine of the church didn't make sense to me. It didn't feel right what those guys with serious faces and black dresses with white collars talked about. It didn't feel right. It didn't add up logically either. But the prayer was the only hope I had... and it didn't work.

Nan is coming...

I didn't feel much. I wanted to. I thought I had to feel something. Where's the sadness when I need it?! Doesn't that mean there's something very wrong with me? I couldn't explain it. I didn't like the numbness. Yes, I was feeling numb.
I knew already that he passed. I was waiting for confirmation hoping still that it would never come. The last time I saw him he lay on hospital bed, unconscious with a  string of yellow liquid coming out his mouth. He lost so much weight. He didn't look like a bear any longer. I somehow knew, but didn't want to admit that to myself. The hope dies last. I've already said goodbye, too. After that hospital visit. That's right. I expressed my goodbye with words of half hearted prayers. I was told that when you pray for miracles they come to you. I didn't know then that my beloved grandfather's passing of cancer would become a blessing in disguise. I didn't know that all pain eventually becomes a blessing and leads me back to the truth I gradually forgot.

It shattered my beliefs completely. The thin thread of hope that I could learn the truth of life and its mysteries was found at Sunday's mass burnt. And with it my mind put up another wall around my heart, for protection from aching again.

My grandfather, my mum's dad was my father figure. Way kinder, way stronger than my biological father. With losing him I lost my faith in god. In god I knew. Again, I didn't know that it was necessary for me to let go of that belief. So eventually years later I could remember the real God, real source of Love that lives and creates through me - the Soul that I am, the Soul that chose this life and its storyline to experience forgetting of my own Divinity...
----
How's your body feeling today?

In recent decades, we've collectively begun to remember that everything is connected to everything else, the wisdom that our ancestors lived by.
There's a direct connection between emotions and the state of our bodies. Emotions that we avoid and don't want to listen to may turn into pains or aches.

When you're feeling pain in your body, close your eyes and breathe slowly. 
Whilst you are breathing, imagine that the air you're inhaling is going straight into that area of your body where the pain resides.
It will take you only a few minutes but may help.

When focusing on the pain, and when you are ready, ask your body, "What are you trying to tell me?".
See if it gives you an answer.

Our bodies communicate with our minds through pain when we keep avoiding listening to their emotional whispers.

They want to be heard. 

But we need to ask them first and give them time.

Before going to doctors or taking painkillers, check in with your emotions. 
You may save yourself time and... be healthier without the pharmaceuticals.
-----
I am like a grain of sand
I used to think that I didn't matter
What can a single grain of sand 
Do to matter?
Be itself 
As there's no other like it
A tinniest of differences is the essence
Of uniqueness 
My thinking made the meaning 
Of how much I did matter based on 
The opinions of those who could not
See the light in me 
Because they didn't feel safe enough to unleash their own rays of divine wisdom
My thinking created emotional response
To the fears of history repeating itself

And I ran from them
And I hid from them
And I could not escape
In any way I tried

But were those meanings even true?
Or was it easier to believe them than
Go against the grain?!
If only a part of my body was different 
I would have not chosen it
As it wouldn't have matched the frequency 
Of Love that I am 
And came to embody
Authenticity is practiced self-love
Authenticity is a symptom of acceptance
I am like a grain of sand
On the beach of infinity
I am a unique and equally important 
Component of the whole
Connected
And integral
I am me 
And I am the whole
----
I cry
I've been crying a lot lately
In last 6 months or so I've cried more than throughout 43 years of my life
But sadness doesn't have access to my tears
My tears flow down my cheeks like a mountain river when I'm feeling touched
When I'm looking at you and see loving acceptance in your eyes
When I see your power
Hear your wisdom
And I cry when I realise I've forgotten to see the real you and I'm seeing you once again, anew 
I cry when I'm happy to the core
I cry when I'm watching a scene of Redemption 
Reconnection
When my heart skips a beat
I cry when I'm feeling its potential 
I cry when I am immersed in the vision
Of united Earth
My heart is a cryer
My heart is a happy cryer
This is me
I cry
I cry a lot, and want to cry more and more 
---
How is your body feeling today? 
Let's connect with our bodies and experience their innate beauty and wisdom. I have a few questions for you:

- Where do you think you should be different in a physical sense?
- Where do you not like your body?

It's not easy to go there, I know. But these few minutes you take each day to acknowledge where you think you're not good enough will change your life. 
It has changed mine. 
With lessened self-judgment, I've created more space within my mind to explore new possibilities and foster more self-belief in all areas of my life. 

More self acceptance equals more self love, and more self love equals more love in your life, more loving and accepting people, more abundant experiences...

It's an ongoing process, and it keeps on giving and giving...

More self acceptance equals more self love, and more self love equals more love in your life, more loving and accepting people, more abundant experiences...

So, if you will, take a minute now and focus on your body. 
You can close your eyes and, in your mind, scan your unique body from the top of your head to your toes. 
Breathe slowly as your attention moves down through the parts of your body. 
Slow down and give the miracle of your body time and attention.

What in your mind would you like to be different? 
Got it? 
Good. 
Now, for the rest of today, contemplate the following:

- Why do I want this part of my body to be different?
- Am I comparing it to someone else whom I think is better than me?
- How is this part of my body connected to me feeling emotionally and mentally safe?
- What have I done to make this part of my body out of my mind?
- How would I feel if I accepted this part of my body as it naturally is?

Anything that comes up, make a note of it on your phone or on paper. 
It can be a memory or realisation.
Sometimes all that it takes to create a shift in life is merely acknowledging where we don't yet love ourselves.

Over time, you'll get more clarity on how accepting this part of your body that you've been judging is connected to your overall sense of well-being and audacity to be your beautiful, authentic self—a unique human being that you are.

And please remember, the reason why you are who you are and you look the way you look is that if you were any different, you wouldn't have the potential to change a piece of your world by being yourself. Simple as that. The jigsaw puzzle is made up of many unique pieces.

I hope this helps. Let me know how you find this exercise.
-----
''There was a time in my life
When I totally sucked at
Feeling who I really am
It was like I had someone
Else's software plugged into
My hard drive
It felt safe
Because I wasn't standing out
Like sore thumb
And I wasn't feeling not manly enough
For being a being
Whose feelings were
Deep as an ocean
And whose feelings were
Not cool as 
As the fire burning
In my belly
It felt utterly horrible
Rejecting my true nature
Eventually, I've learned
I've learned that emotions
Are the guidance from my body
I've learned 
But to practice feeling them
It's another story
Way deeper than the ocean
Way hotter than the fire 
It's my nature 
Which of I wanted to forget
It's my nature
Which I have to keep 
Reminding myself of
Every single day 
When I sense that
I'm beginning once again
Burying myself 
Under the snow of
Expectations and desires
Of my thinking mind
When I'm forgetting my heart
And giving my mind
Which judges me and others
The reins
Every single day I need to
Practice presence
To remember who I am''
-----
The mind is like a house
That designs its rooms
With comments 
And looks
And sighs 
And eye rolls
And smiles
And nods
And claps
Of the fellow pilgrims
Who too have forgotten 
The frequency of their heart
----
Imagine an organism inside of which 
the majority of trillions of cells 
are in competition with each other.
This is what we see when we look around.
This is what we participate in, to varying degrees.
To make our Earth a place of unity, inclusion, acceptance and peace, 
we need to collaborate and bring to the table what's natural for each of us.
Each of us is a single cell, 
connected to the rest 
via invisible network 
made of pure energy - love. 
Our conditioned for separation consciousness minds can not see 
what our hearts know, though.
Perhaps it's time to start listening 
to our hearts and let their guidance 
be helped by action taking abilities 
of the mind...
-----

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